Monday, November 25, 2019

Did you grow up in a fairytale or a nigtmare?

Recently I told a close friend that my childhood was idyllic.  Not perfect but perhaps as close to Norman Rockwell as possible.  One of the many things that made my life fairytale like as a child is I was raised in New Braunfels, TX by a mother and a father and had four siblings.  Our was a small town with German roots and values.  My mother never worked outside the home but Dad got her involved in many of his business ventures.  

In addition, we had an extended family of many Aunts, Uncles and cousins who were there for each other when things were good and not so good.  Role models and playmates for us to model and observe family values and to hold us accountable if we stepped out of line.

Perhaps that is one of the reason I left New Braunfels when I was 18.  I wanted to make my own way including my own mistakes and my own success.  Looking back I made more thatn a few mistakes but like most of my extended family, we found our way and made out own path.  I certainly did alright for a small-town girl with no college education, a lot of street smarts and a get it done attitude.  I'll write another post someday about me winning the lottery time and time again.

These conversations have led one of my friends and I down many interesting roads discussing, among other things, the demise of the American family and the consequences of that demise.  As we have discussed, perhaps one of the costs of this demise is the ever increasing suicide rate in our young people. Please feel free to offer your opinions.

Unlike me, she did not have an idyllic childhood.  She grew up in the nightmare of alcoholism.  My church hosts many 12 step programs and I have heard many times that addiction is a family dysfunction and one of the classic symptoms is denial by everyone in the family.  Many people are helped by practicing the recovery steps offered in a 12 step program and these programs are able to help all concerned.   I know she has benefited from many, many years in Al-Anon.   She is a gifted coach and sponsor helping people ready to deal with the nightmare of addiction and family dysfunction.

So, no matter which environment you grew up in or somewhere in between you probably have learned many lessons from those presented.   I have learned to move on and take the good with the bad and be thankful for the lessons I have learned, am learning and will learn.  

I will end with a quote most commonly attributed to Pierre Teilhard de Chardin:

We are not human beings having a spiritual experience. We are spiritual beings having a human experience.

Not a bad way to look at and experience life's journey.



















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